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Wednesday, September 22, 2004
Needs no snarky caption
Photo accompanying NYT article entitled "Kerry in a Struggle for a Democratic Base: Women," from Sen. Kerry's appearance on Tuesday on "Live With Regis and Kelly":
Displaying the same sensitive diplomacy as Sen. Kerry has shown toward America's allies in the Global War on Terror, here's what a Kerry pollster has to say (boldface added):
Diane Feldman, a pollster for the Kerry campaign, said she did not accept that Mr. Kerry was losing among women and insisted that the campaign's own polling showed Mr. Kerry winning among women.
Ms. Feldman would not disclose the campaign's numbers but said they showed Mr. Kerry's standing with women "below what we would expect in exit polls on Election Day, and we have room for growth." She added, "we're winning them, but not by as much as we will." She said she was confident of that prediction because women traditionally were late deciders.
Gee, Ms. Feldman — while you're at it, why don't you throw in that they can't drive worth a dang either? Sheesh!
Oh, well, maybe this one caption: "Kelly? Kelly? Won't you clap for me at least once, Kelly? Like this?"
I'm sure you can do better. The comments are open, have at 'em. (Just keep it non-profane/non-sexually oriented, please; I know the one you're thinking of.)
Posted by Beldar at 03:41 AM in Humor, Politics (2006 & earlier) | Permalink
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Comments
(1) Paul Zrimsek made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 4:52:41 AM | Permalink
I've really had only one position on Iraq all along. I was just slow in realizing how much I needed to dumb it down for all you blondes.
(2) perfectsense made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 6:49:51 AM | Permalink
When I was in Vietnam, sometimes my boat would get this close to a deadly mine that could have killed us all, but my leadership always saved my men from harm.
(3) Lola made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 7:30:49 AM | Permalink
You know, you really should take a look at the recent photos of Kerry surfing, playing (or trying to) football, baseball and soccer (boy, I just can't get rid of that image of Kerry boffing that soccer ball off his head with that goofy, toothy grin from my mind). Compare with Bush in his pilot uniform back in the TANG days, that photo on Newsweek, Sept 6 issue, etc. Take a few of each, and have an informal survey amongst your female relatives, friends, etc. and see which candidate attracts them on a personal level. There's an interesting discussion about this over at Roger L. Simon, in the comments section.
(4) BarCodeKing made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 7:40:34 AM | Permalink
"Boy, it's great to be here on the Regis and Kathie Lee show. I love how you talk so much about that kid of yours, Cody. We Democrats are strong on family values, you know. And we love sports, too. Why, just recently, I was at Lambert Field in Green Bay, Wisconsin..."
(5) Marc made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 8:06:04 AM | Permalink
"I was this close to Cambodia."
"If I could get my mitts on that Howard Dean... why I otta...!"
"You see superscript should be this close the the preceeding word." "It took me weeks to learn... nevermind!"
Said on Nov. 3rd: We were this close, but no worries, Edwards is a shyster you know, and I got Gore's cell number.
(6) JakeThe Snake made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 8:21:38 AM | Permalink
here's the church, and here's the steeple, open it up, and here's all the people
(7) Capitalist Tool made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 8:36:19 AM | Permalink
"If you only knew how important I am..."
(8) ES made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 8:59:24 AM | Permalink
"I'm torn between two answers Reeg. For the war or against it? For or against? I'd have to pick...against. Yes that's it I'm against the war. That's my final answer!... Is it too late to ask for a lifeline?"
(9) captainahab made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 9:25:21 AM | Permalink
I'm hoping that women will vote for me before they vote against me!
(10) captainahab made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 9:27:56 AM | Permalink
I'm hoping that women will vote for me before they vote against me!
(11) Dimsdale made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 9:55:00 AM | Permalink
Let's see.
President Bush is speaking on front of the UN on the issue of human rights and aid for the liberation of Iraq.
Kerry is on Regis and Kelly.
Now tell me again, who is the serious candidate for President? LOL!
Kerry's liberal/women's talk show splash is just an orchestrated attempt to get his horsey, obviously Botoxed face in the news, and suck up to women with prescripted "jokes" and small talk.
I bet they could tape six Regis and Kelly shows with Kerry, ask the same questions, and get six different shows.
(12) OCBill made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 9:57:26 AM | Permalink
Compare and contrast:
- George Bush at the United Nations
- John Kerry on "Live with Regis and Kelly"
(13) geezer made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 10:43:44 AM | Permalink
Is it just me, or does Reeg look a little frightened/intimidated/wary of Lurch?
(14) Dan made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 11:10:18 AM | Permalink
Kerry: Kelly, Regis, these are perilous times for journalists and I've always loved your show. So, I want to give you this magic hat just to make sure you both get through.
(15) skokorat made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 12:20:00 PM | Permalink
Kerry: One more time Kelly. Yes your last contract was decent but if you really want to be wealthy choose your next husband more carefully.
(16) skokorat made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 12:20:48 PM | Permalink
Kerry: One more time Kelly. Yes your last contract was decent but if you really want to be wealthy choose your next husband more carefully.
(17) honts made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 1:29:20 PM | Permalink
So I said to Teresa, "back up the Suburban, I mean the NEON, and I'll put the windsurfer on top." She missed running me over by this much!
(18) jack white made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 1:42:26 PM | Permalink
I can't resist. Imagine Kerry, donning his best Navy whites, with that obnoxious Brahmin accent:
"I love the smell of Estrogen in the morning."
No hate mail, please.
(19) Roundguy made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 1:47:29 PM | Permalink
I just noticed. His head realy is bigger, literally, than Regis or Kelly. Guess I understand his big head theories.
"I once caught a fish this big".
(20) bob kleiber made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 2:23:34 PM | Permalink
uuuuhhhh.....you rang? I mean, yes Regis.
(21) trapped in mn made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 2:29:26 PM | Permalink
so then I took the hamster like this and I started to blow into its mouth......
(22) Radio made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 5:39:56 PM | Permalink
I was this close to being informed about the Rathergate details. Lucky break for me I went windsurfing that afternoon.
or
I was this close to being tried for Treason after my trip to Paris to negotiate with our enemies in 1970.
(23) willem made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 5:49:40 PM | Permalink
"Seriously. It is all about me. My mother always said it -- Teresa, too. It's all about me. I am better than you because."
(24) rhodeymark made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 5:59:16 PM | Permalink
"Regis became uneasy as the giant suddenly grew more animated. Kelly, fascinated, tried hard not to stare - remembering what she'd been taught about differently abled people."
(25) rhodeymark made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 6:00:54 PM | Permalink
"Regis became uneasy as the giant suddenly grew more animated. Kelly, fascinated, tried hard not to stare - remembering what she'd been taught about differently abled people."
(26) Dimsdale made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 9:42:49 PM | Permalink
Let's see.
President Bush is speaking on front of the UN on the issue of human rights and aid for the liberation of Iraq.
Kerry is on Regis and Kelly.
Now tell me again, who is the serious candidate for President? LOL!
Kerry's liberal/women's talk show splash is just an orchestrated attempt to get his horsey, obviously Botoxed face in the news, and suck up to women with prescripted "jokes" and small talk.
I bet they could tape six Regis and Kelly shows with Kerry, ask the same questions, and get six different shows.
(27) Greg F made the following comment | Sep 22, 2004 9:56:45 PM | Permalink
"On Christmas in Cambodia I caught a fish that was this big!"
(28) David Blue made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 1:24:35 AM | Permalink
"In Cambodia I learned to do the Cat's Cradle, the Manger, Candles, the Cat's Eye, and Diamond. Come on, I'll prove it to you ..."
(29) Pigilito made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 7:42:35 AM | Permalink
Regis thinking to himself: Geez, can his head really be that big? I mean, it's gargantuan. With a coconaut that big, it's no wonder he's always falling over; maybe I'd better scoot back a bit more.
(30) Beto Ochoa made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 12:12:49 PM | Permalink
"Did you know I have a piece of shrapnel in my butt this big?" "I have three purple hearts too!"
(31) Ed Wissel made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 12:45:12 PM | Permalink
"...so Teresa said, my spare change is on my bureau in a box about this big..."
(32) Ed Wissel made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 12:45:45 PM | Permalink
"...so Teresa said, my spare change is on my bureau in a box about this big..."
(33) LazyMF made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 3:24:53 PM | Permalink
"President Bush regularly snorted lines of cocaine this long."
(34) Dan S made the following comment | Sep 23, 2004 5:48:05 PM | Permalink
Beldar!
Enough with the Evercrack!
(I should talk, must go run my harvesters on SWG...)
Just missing reading your posts today. I know, I know, you have a day job too.
(35) Jim N made the following comment | Sep 24, 2004 2:22:15 PM | Permalink
Kerry: I love you Regis, I love you Mr. Letterman, I will love Dr. Phil, now how many more dog and pony shows do I have to do to pay CBS back for "rathergate"?
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